Whenever movie aficionados get together to discuss great film directors like Steven Spielberg, David Lean, François Truffaut, and Kathryn Bigelow, Neil Breen’s name is never mentioned. There is a good reason for this. The veteran filmmaker may have five full-length feature films under his belt, but in terms of the quality of his output, he’s right up therewith Ed Woodand Tommy Wiseau.
In other words, Breen is a director of badfilms. If you’re unfamiliar with the term, you’ll surely know the type: a badfilm is one of those guilty pleasures, a complete turkey that nevertheless gains an audience because it’s “so bad it’s good.” As everyone knows since the success of Wiseau’s legendary dramaThe Room, such films are watchable precisely because they fail at doing what they intend to do.
Breen’s oeuvre may be risible in conventional terms, but it’s gained a loyal following in the past few years for its by turns subpar, ludicrous, and plain eccentric nature. Now Breen is ready to go with his sixth feature,Cade: The Tortured Crossing. Here’s why we’re excited to watch.
Breen Has Form When It Comes to Badfilms
It’s fair to say that Breen’s films have a great deal in common. They tend to feature protagonists with unusual or superhuman abilities, and their mission in life is to right wrongs, which in practice usually translates to bringing pesky governments and big corporations to heel.
Related:Neil Breen: The Best of the Worst, Ranked
The most ludicrous of these, perhaps, was his 2012 effortFateful Findings. Shot on less than a shoestring budget with unknown actors, the film centered around the life of Dylan, a novelist who discovers that he possesses psychic powers, and sets out to expose the corruption and immorality of government and big business.
The plot lurches from one improbable event to another with scant regard for plausibility or causality, but the most affecting moment, albeit for the wrong reasons, is the film’s climax. Dylan gives a speech to the media in which he reveals he has discovered the secrets of the powers that be, and their representatives, including politicians in high office,Wall Street brokers, and “the president of the bank,” kill themselves rather than face repercussions for their crimes. In short, Breen has a remarkable pedigree behind him when it comes to making badfilms.
Cade: The Tortured Crossing is Breen’s First Sequel
Maybe it’s time to start talking of a “Breeniverse.“Cade: The Tortured Crossingcontinues where 2018’sTwisted Pairleft off. The trailer dropped at the end of December and shows Breen’s latest film to be just as shoddy as his previous ones, withterrible green screen effects, acting that the average plank of wood would find embarrassing, and a plot of some description.
In fact, the official synopsis states that the robot AI Cade Altair fromTwisted Pairenters a mysterious mental hospital in order to imbue the patients with mystical powers, enabling them to fight “for humanity and justice.” “They are coming for you, my warriors,” Breen says while strolling through a dilapidated room full of writhing mental hospital patients in less than portentous tones. “This is what I’ve been preparing you for.”
Related:Why Michael Flatley’s Blackbird Could Be on Par With Tommy Wiseau’s The Room
The crazyfight scenes, laughably poor line readings, and strange directorial choices make for a film that, no matter how numerous its failings, doesn’t promise to be dull.
To be fair, not all the actors Breen casts in his films are as wooden as he is. Some of them actually have professional experience, albeit of a modest sort. His co-star inFateful Findings, Jennifer Autry, appeared in an episode ofAngelin a bit part and also starred in the 2005 slasher flickTransamerican Killer.
The real issue is that Breen’s scripts feature such ham-fisted dialog that it’s doubtful even the Tom Hanks and Meryl Streeps of this world could do anything to make them sound natural. Add nonsensical plots, bizarre character motivations, and modest acting chops into the mix, and the result can often be unintentionally hilarious.
Whatever one thinks about Breen’s creative misadventures, however, there’s one thing that one has to admire, and that is his determination to have his say and see his projects through to completion. As he notes in an interview withInflux Magazine, low-budget film-makers need to be resourceful if their endeavors are to see the light of day, and it’s hard to argue that if there’s one thing that characterizes Breen’s absurdly overambitious science fiction epics, it’s resourcefulness.
According toCade: The Tortured Crossing’sofficial website, Breen has submitted the movie to several film festivals, with the intention of screening it early in 2023, so we may be able to see it soon.
